my glory covers you.
woah.. you silenced me with that man.
you’re the coolest.
omg. i walked back home from parkway.
i actually walked back home the whole way.
and i wasnt tired at all. praise god.
supernatural strength.
amen.
(actually was cus i had no money to take bus tts why i decided to walk home, cus pp nt v far fr my house anyway. but thats not the point k, the point is i actually walked back home on foot all the way. we’re truly living in the days of miracles!)
cus i lift my hands to the heavens for the lord my god is here!
i wanna know the sound of your heart!
**
i miss my kdramas!! im going to start watching them again!! put them off for so long cus scared i emo. now i shall start again. my loves my loves my loves!
im super excited abt watchin again. wahahah can you tell?? hahahaah! evan evan!! what drama should i watch!! i shall go do research and marathon.. shiok!!
listen to the korean on tv only i also shiok alrd… HAHAAHAH YAY!!
i love mango sales.
i seriously love mango sales.
i got 4 dresses today with my mama, love my dresses. 2 casual dresses one wrap dress and one work/formal dress. haha im intending to go back for afew more dressy stuff, for like the upcomin weddings and events whatevers. wait till the 70%. heh.
heeheehee. i love sales.
in quietness and in [trusting] confidence shall be your strength.
isaiah 30:15
But let it be the inward adorning and beauty of the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible and unfading charm of a gentle and peaceful spirit, which [is not anxious or wrought up, but] is very precious in the sight of God.
1 peter 3:4
this quiet and trusting confidence in you, this gentle and peaceful spirit that only comes from that deep knowing that you will always show up. whether or not circumstances give me shit, at the end of the day you will always show up.
there was this whole rampage of insecurites that ran through me last night. im nt pretty enough, not smart enough, not good enough. i felt disgusted at myself for feeling so insecure, its like i saw myself on third party view and was disgusted with what i saw. it left me feeling helpless and really, quite worthless.
but through that talk with abba and ms MT, confirmed with today’s devotional that i got last mdnight. strength found me, again. i nearly fell this time, but your hands caught me just in time to lift me up.
this is one of the most beautiful seasons i’ve ever been in. a time so precious because i can wholly devote every move every step to you. its living the dream of a life without stress, just knowing that you guide my step every way. bein in a job i enjoy, a job that adds to my work experience, that has known so much of your favor, no worries, lovin every moment, livin the shiok life. and what makes all of that even more precious, is that intimate knowledge that you take me for whatever i am, the insecurity tendencies, the too-often bursts of loud noise, the stubborness and argueing back, the lack of wisdom in cases.. and i know that all these imperfection in me, you can and will take away with your own supernatural grace for me.
gosh. im overwhelmed by what you’re doing in my life and am so excited to see whats gonna happen when it all manifests. in looking back 5 years from now, its gonna be so exciting.
(:
its in that knowing that i am your child, that all i have is your favor that covers me, that all i boast of it your glory that exudes from my very being. that is the only way i can spend a day like this and at the end of the day still boast, ‘the lord is faithful and will always be faithful to me’
because without you i dont know what kind of person i will be. sometimes i see glimpses of what kind of person i might have been without you, an incredibly insecure person who fills her gaps with clothes friends and whatnots. but i have you. and i am not that person no more. so i praise you. its like solomon writing about the beloved. the dark kedar tents, i sometimes see that of myself, but oh you beautiful you, you tell me to meditate on the 4 faces you have given me, the curtains of solomon, the beauty that fills your heart with joy. i am pleasing to your eye, you take joy in me, take pleasure in me. for that.. i am so deeply grateful to your love.
haha. wanted is such an incredibly stupid movie!!
but its very wooooosh.. and angelina jolie is damn hot.
god… use that glory that covers me make people think im hotter den angelina jolie. HAHA then maybe brad would leave her for me.. but then again. its not as if i want brad anyway. i want…. gah.
ooh got free make up today. so shiok,
was just tellin dad, alamak i jsut gave away all my eyeshadows and whatevers, i really only have my blusher my foundation and eyeliner left. how to serve with that basic makeup. dajie sure kill. so praise you. because today i got free makeup! like a ‘hey babe, im providing for you man. worry not’ hahahaha!
im leavin cleo next week.
wonderful journey. share next time.
(:
next time i smile at you, smile back.
like this (:
hor.
sometimes i think about all that i want to achieve all that i want to do and it scares me.
i say i am determined to do it, but so many times i fall and then i realise that i wasnt really that determined at all. but when i made that decision to be determined i was really determined though, or at least i thought i was..
but i know that it is all truly in your hands.
all these that i want to achieve all these that i plan to do. you know em you keep em and you bring them to pass. you told me to live in the now, in the today. man i love that conversation with you. that intimate so-real conversation with you, like a talk-reply conversation, as if you’re infront of me with my starbucks hotchocolate. but yeah. in living in the now its just making that decision every day, waking up to your new mercies every morning and knowing that i wanna make this decision today, i dont care if i fell yesterday or if i might fall tomorrow, today at least, i am yours for sure. man.. awesome.
convos with you are like.. a taste of heaven. (:
love you. gdnight.
hmm.. afternoon naps are the greatest luxury.
i had one of the dreamiest afternoon naps in a long time. the sun was perfect, not too strong and hot, but still there to create the kind of angelic warm effect for the tiny moments i peek open to check the time. plus ofcourse theres the pretty tall trees of mandarin gardens that give that resort vibe, so much i can almost pretend im not really in singapore… anyway, the fan was nicely blowing at my back at just the right temp, the sound the fan makes also makes me sleepy actually. haha fans work better than aircon because naps shouldnt include a blanket. it should be just lazing around. and i had 4 pillows surrounding me.. perfect.
the best factor - no one around to disturb me, no schedule to tell me that i shouldnt be sleeping i should be studying, no meeting to worry about, no articles to wonder if i havent completed, no alarm to keep my napping time in check.. just bumming around until i feel shiok enough.
i had a luncheon meat and egg sandwich before my little nap, so my stomach was very comforted with my favourite comfort food of all time. cereal- kokocrunch would have been nice but we ran out of it.
i don think i can live like this everyday, its too decadent. but once in awhile.. like a whole bar of chocolate. its super shiok. hahaha
(: kay. i go out eat naan. (very yummy naan)
theres alot i want to see.
in 5 years down,
to see the girls getting married,
to see us all working, in proper jobs, earning proper money
to still have lunches at random places, talk about random stuff
to maybe still be at choir practice every wednesday
to hopefully still be serving together every sunday (or alt)
to sit around and talk about our jobs and lives like now
to share our dreams and what dreams are coming true
to look back and sigh together about how faithful daddyG has been to us
to flip through photos and giggle about our hair and clothes
actually, i just want 5 years from now to be the same as now. just the updated improved versions of us, all alot more wiser, all much more glorious than now, all with more faith in his promised work.
was reading multiply,
and when jo said that she took the journey and it was all good, yvonne was there to say that she witnessed that journey and yes, truly it was good.
i want that daddy. i want that in 5 years time. for me to look at melody and say, hey mel. we’ve all grown in wisdom eh? for wanhua to look at me and say, look, god is really faithful. remember what we shared on june 25th 08. for kaiwen to look back and tell me hey cherri, i cannot believed i lived 19 years without knowing his goodness, life with him is really just beautiful. for rach to tell me, look cherri, we made the right choice, to tithe our youth to daddygod. haha and celeste, and evan.. gosh. so many things i want to see.
hahaha
its really the night of many thoughts huh.
k i go sleep now.
the night of many questions, many thoughts.
ponder ponder.
hmm.
jesus? answers?
if theres anything that i like about you, its that you really dont care about what others think of you. you are just you. whether people think you’re too loud, think you’re childish, think you’re weird.. you dont care. you just be you and do whatever you want to do whenever you want to. like being a ninja in the middle of the congregation, or just being enthusiastic about what you like even if its really odd. hahaha.
i think i wanna learn to be like that.
just security in the lord.
cus whatever other people think, really doesnt matter.
i’ll be as noisy as i want, as high pitched as i want, as silly as i want, as action packed as i want, as nonsense as i want. and i wont bother about what you think, cus you’re not god.
im special in his eyes. and thats all that im gonna be conscious about.
becus i dont think i’ll remember to tell you,
when you smsed me to not oversleep on the bus and that its alrd so late..
i was very touched. (:
love you alot melody tham.
how do you define substance?
i think sometimes it takes a little talking about the good in your life to forget the bad and make even more good happen. like.. magic!
this is my anointed extra virgin $9.80 that is anointed by the holy spirit and shall be put to good use in my life. places to anoint part 1, crown of my head - temples, forehead, my lips- so that the words i say shall be all anointed and of weight, my eyes - that i may see my enemies defeated, my ears - that i may hear their defeat, my throat - that ever note i sing, whether pitch perfect or not shall be filled with anointing, my fingers - so all that i do will always prosper, my tummy - er.. so that it will go away, my back- no more backaches for me! amen! back of my thigh - the bloodclot and scar will drop off, amen. soles of my feet - that everywhere i walk shall be directed by the holy spirit! the back of my feet - so that no new shoes shall give me blisters no matter how hard they are.
part 2. my laptop - so that all work done on it will only be good, my wallet - so that my provision will always be supernaturally there, daisy the ipod - that the songs in it will minister to anyone listening, my handphone - so i dont ever have to lose it or let it get stolen ever, my camera - so that my photos will only reflect of god’s goodness in my life, my notebook - so that everything written in there will only be a testimony of how wonderful being a child of god is, the 4 corners of my room - so that no cockroach lizard insect shall come near me they shall all die in jesus name! my pillow - because the lord gives his beloved sleep, my facial foam- so that i ‘ll never have pimples!! my bathfoam - my whole body is anointed! my shampoo - so that i’ll not drop hair and my hair will be super nice and thick. the doors of my wardrobe- to remind me that its not the clothes that gives me beauty, its the glory of the lord that clothes me.
ok. i cant think of anymore right now. but i will definitely think of more sooner or later.
hello evan hello wawa! i realise my eyes look really tiny! but its ok. hahaha i love you both!
im a pirate i tell you, i am captain jack sparrow’s secret girlfriend, and i play the medallion pirates song by hans zimmer super well. amen. hahaha
oh no my hair is dropping though. hahahaahahah
and and and,
to declare your lovingkindness in the morning
and your faithfulness every night
psalms 92:2
i will declare your lovingkindness everymorning, let it be the first thought that comes to my mind, that longing to want to spend time in your presence just to be filled with the beauty of all you are. and with that, by the end of each day i’ll know your goodness in my life, so awe-filled by your faithfulness i cannot help but just know, you are god.
amen. (:
you lord, you say that only when i live in the unknown, then i can truly put my everything in your hands. pastor made it very clear today. it was shouting to me, i caught it dad.
this is all goin to the pile that says ‘i dont knw what to do now’. the pile is getting bigger dad, its a good thing right? because they’re all goin in ur hands. you promise you make good for me, right? right?
right?
____
right. (:
because no matter what happens, whether its this or that, jesus you say your blood was shed so it would be made well for us whichever result. both ways are beautiful. its like an awesome win-win end where romans 828 shows up anyway. no pangseh for sure.
haha god is very good i tell you!
yay melody i love our talks.
actually god put alot of good people around me. i can never fall!!!!! (too deep)
__
“Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch?”
matt 6:27
i think my lilies verse is the word in season for me. no more adorning myself with outer beauty but finding that inner glory that only you can constantly renew and provide.
both of them, matthews and jz are right. whats the point of fussing, whats the point of worrying.. will it be of any use? no! so.. zuo si mi! 
i hear you daddy!
the week is over!
thankyou jesus for bringing me through. without you and your favor, this week would have been quite a terrible one.
from returning my gown with sooooo much favor - cus the deadline was over already actually but the person specially extended it for me on wednesday morning, praise god. because i procrastinated for so long its definitely my fault even if they dont want to accept my gown anymore. but praise you, praise you for giving me favor with that person on the phone.
to waking up late and yet still be able to complete whatever they had me do in the day. oh praise you praise you. (:
and for daphne to gimme the invitation to that fashion show by dusty, even though its not really what i would wear, but it definitely was an eyeopener, and i love the macaroons. hahahaha the chocolates, the pistacios, the rose/strawberry ones.. ooh bakerzin somemore. i love i love!
and then icecream with the super little hot fudge with wawa and celeste. i need to find a nickname for celeste.. something embarrassing. hahaahahahah no–elllll… no–ellll….
melody hows the ball? are you pretty in black, as celeste would say? hahaha i wanna see pictures ok! pictures of you. hy is if need den show lah. hahahahahaah
and rachel chua. i havent seen you in ages.
we shall spend the whole of sunday in each other’s face. HAHA breakfast at 930am!! do not be late, me too. HAHA
i hate seeing the people i love walking down the exact same path i stumbled through, to reach that very same dilemma, to reach either that very same heartache or do something they shouldnt.
but who’s to say whats to do what not to do anyway.
you live in them too, so if you can guide me, though through many bumps and falls, im sure you can guide them too. just please holy spirit, save them from some of the bumps. cus the pain is really so.. real.
i dont want to be the party pooper, but i was there! i myself, me and my little heart, my little heart and my messy emotions were there! maybe im makin a mountain out of a molehill, maybe im just worrying thinking too much, maybe maybe maybe. hmm, maybe i just forgot that you’ve got the whole world in your hands.
and what to do when i see destruction before my eyes, an atomic bomb waiting to explode, trouble brewing so deeply my spirit is so affected by it. i dont know dad. i really dont know what to do. it sucks. now worst that you make melody show me scripture, as if a reminder of what i try so hard to push to the back of my head. it sucks. but what can i do, im not you, im not god. but hey, zhang zhang zhannnggg. revelation. you are! and you love them as much as i do, more even. so.. i plead the blood over this matter. whatever happens lord. you put romans 828 there and make sure the devil does not succeed in his attempts.
i feel like an old lorsoh little lady sometimes, the OLLL hehs. the one always at the back worrying nagging making sure that no one does the wrong thing. but i dont want to be like that. i just wanna be the girl in your arms, carefree and loved.
(: i start tonight. lets sleep with a smiling heart.
one of the best machines invented is the steamer.
i shall never have an iron in my house.
it shall always be a steamer.
so much easier to use and fun at the same time. hahaha wahah
dear future husband, please do start your research for a good steamer we can invest in!
